Presented by Dan-Os Seasoning

Memo From The Department of Sandwich Classification: Guidelines for a Nation in Crisis

It is the new policy of the World Department of Food Categorization By Arbitrary Rules that “Sandwiches are sandwiches and tacos are tacos and any citizen suggesting otherwise will be subject to immediate re-education via Food Network marathons.” The Justice Department and its components will identify and eliminate any Hinge prompts that say otherwise.

Hot dogs are hereby classified as "cylindrical meat conveyances" and will no longer be discussed in relation to sandwiches at dinner parties, Reddit threads, or first dates. The words "Is a hot dog a sandwich?" are, as of this writing, illegal in the United States, because no conversation containing this phrase has ever improved anyone's life in any measurable way.

Other policies in this memorandum include—No more “open faced sandwiches. That is a “loaded toast,” "half-sandwich," "bread-based delivery platform (BBDP)," or "incomplete failure of a lunch experience."

All of that to say that, every culture in the world has independently developed some version of "stuff between or inside other stuff" that you can eat with your hands. From the Earl of Sandwich's revolutionary gambling snack to the modern-day Taco Bell Crunchwrap Supreme, we've been perfecting the art of handheld meals for millennia. But what's really going on with these foods? Are they all just variations on a theme, or distinct culinary categories deserving their own taxonomical branches? Today we’re diving into the meat of the issue…yes, I did just do that.

Yum Yum Get Ya Sum - It’s (Chili) Lime Time

There’s only one thing that can elevate a sandwich no matter what: proper seasoning. Dan-Os Seasoning, founded in 2015 by Louisville native Dan Oliver, has revolutionized how people approach flavor in their handheld creations.

What began as Dan’s college experiments with chicken thighs evolved into a mission to inspire the world to make healthier food choices without sacrificing flavor. With high-quality ingredients, real sea salt, and no sugar or additives, Dan-Os has become the secret weapon for sandwich enthusiasts looking to up their game.

The best part? Their new flavor, Chili Lime, is now available on their website and Amazon. Grab a 2-pack here, and be sure to check out all their recipes on Pepper!

The Etymology and Taxonomy of Handheld Foods

I've spent an embarrassing amount of time thinking about this, but I've concluded that all handheld foods fall into one of five structural categories:

1. True Sandwich: Two separate pieces of bread with filling between them

2. Taco: One piece of starch folded around filling with exposed top

3. Wrap: Fully enclosed cylinder of filling with sealed ends

4. Burger: Specific subset of sandwich with ground protein patty

5. Sausage in Casing: Meat tube that may or may not be in additional bread

This isn't just me being pedantic (though I absolutely am), but Aristotle categorized animals, Linnaeus organized plants, and I'm just trying to bring some order to the chaotic world of lunch.

By this definition, a hot dog is structurally a taco, as is a sub sandwich where the bread isn't completely separated.

The crazy part of all this is that legal world has needed to weigh in. In 2006, a Massachusetts court ruled in the case of White City Shopping Center LP v. PR Restaurants LLC that a burrito is not a sandwich. The case centered on whether a Panera Bread could exclude a Qdoba Mexican Grill from a shopping center based on a clause giving Panera exclusive rights to sell sandwiches. The judge ruled that "a sandwich is not commonly understood to include burritos, tacos, and quesadillas."

What’s in a Name?

Sandwich:

The word "sandwich" gave rise to “to sandwich," meaning to insert it between two similar items in the 1800s. By the 1930s, "sandwiched" described feeling pressured or squeezed between two forces, much like the filling between bread slices.

Burger:

While clearly shortened from "hamburger," the "ham" part has nothing to do with pork. Hamburg, Germany, gave its name to the "Hamburg steak"—a ground beef patty that German immigrants brought to America in the 19th century. The first documented "hamburger sandwich" appears in American menus around the 1880s.

Taco:

Taco comes from the Nahuatl word "tlahco," meaning "half" or "in the middle," referring to the way the tortilla folds around the filling. When Spanish colonizers encountered this food, they adopted both the concept and the name.

One of my favorite food history facts is that the taco evolved from silver mines in Mexico, where the word "taco" originally referred to the small charges used to extract ore. The folded tortilla with filling resembled these paper-wrapped gunpowder charges. Miners would wrap their meals in tortillas, creating "tacos de minero" (miner's tacos).

Hot dog:

German immigrants brought their "dachshund sausages" to America in the 19th century. During a baseball game at the Polo Grounds in New York, vendors were selling these sausages in buns. A cartoonist, observing the scene, drew a dachshund dog in a bun, but wasn't sure how to spell "dachshund," so he labeled it "hot dog." The cartoon was a hit, and the name stuck. (Historians debate whether this story is completely accurate, but I like it)

History 101: The Original Handheld Revolution

The sandwich as we know it today is attributed to the 4th Earl of Sandwich, John Montagu, who in 1762 reportedly asked for meat between bread so he could continue gambling without getting his cards greasy.

TLDR: The Timeline of Handheld Food

• 6000 BCE: Mesopotamians wrap meat in flatbread

• 100 BCE: Roman street vendors sell sausages in bread

• 1100s CE: Genghis Khan's army carries meat under their saddles, creating the world's first burger patties

• 1762 CE: Earl of Sandwich popularizes the modern sandwich

• 1840s: German immigrants bring hamburger steak to America

• 1870s: Hot dog hits Coney Island

• 1950s: Tacos become mainstream in the US

• 1970s: Wraps emerge as the health-conscious sandwich alternative

• 2010s: The Instagram sandwich renaissance begins

That being said, while the Earl gets all the credit, Middle Eastern and Mediterranean cultures had been eating pita with fillings for centuries. Ancient Romans ate "ofella"—meat slices on bread—as street food, and in the Middle East, flatbreads stuffed with various fillings have been documented since at least the 10th century.

What Your Sandwich Order Says About You

The Turkey Club Enthusiast: You're reliable but secretly wish you were more interesting. You probably have strong opinions about proper email sign off etiquette.

The PB&J Devotee: You're nostalgic and find comfort in the familiar. You likely still have your childhood stuffed animal hidden somewhere in your bedroom.

Well-Seasoned Sally: You understand that the difference between good and great lies in the details. You probably keep a bottle of Dan-O’s new Chili Lime seasoning by your prep station and aren’t afraid to experiment with flavors. Your friends come to you for cooking advice, and you’ve definitely improved someone’s life by introducing them to proper seasoning techniques. You’re thoughtful, detail-oriented, and probably have excellent taste in music too.

The Customizer: You have strong boundaries and know exactly what you want in life. Your friends find you both inspiring and exhausting.

The Italian Sub Connoisseur: You appreciate the classics and have strong opinions about them. You've definitely corrected someone's pronunciation of "prosciutto" at some point.

The "Whatever's Cheapest" Minimalist: Either you're legitimately broke or you're a tech billionaire practicing asceticism. There's no in-between.

The Salad Person Who Still Hangs Out at Sandwich Shops: You want to be included but refuse to fully commit. You're the same in your romantic relationships.

The No-Mayo Person: You've made avoiding condiments a personality trait. You probably tell people you "don't listen to mainstream music” and “don't own a TV."

The World's Most Famous Handhelds & How To Make Them

The Cuban

The Cuban sandwich—with its layers of roast pork, ham, Swiss cheese, pickles, and mustard pressed between Cuban bread—didn't actually originate in Cuba. It was born in the Cuban immigrant communities of Florida, particularly in Tampa and later Miami. The sandwich represents a fusion of cultures: Cuban bread, Spanish roast pork, German mustard, Swiss cheese, and Italian salami (in the Tampa version).

Recipe

The Bánh Mì

The bánh mì tells the story of French colonialism in Vietnam through food. The French brought their baguettes and pâté, while Vietnamese cooks added their own ingredients like cilantro, pickled vegetables, and fish sauce.

Recipe

The Burger

The burger has gone from humble German immigrant food to global icon. The Hamburg steak came to America with German immigrants in the 19th century, but putting it on bread was the American innovation. McDonald's alone sells approximately 75 hamburgers every second.

Recipe